I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
I've been thinking a lot about this. Stirring up love before it pleases is similar to what I used to do as a kid during the weeks leading up to Christmas morning. Upon discovering Santa's true identity, I got curious about the whereabouts of his many wonderful gifts, and finally figured out that the only place they could be in our smallish, jam-packed house was the basement. It's really a dank, dark, mouse-infested cellar if we're being honest--all of us kids were afraid of it, and so we'd do our best to lock one another down there in the dark whenever possible.
When the Christmas season rolled around, though, it was a whole different story. A turn of the corner at the bottom of the stairs, pushing past the dust-laden coat rack, and you were staring at a heaping pile of shopping bags, half-wrapped presents with our five misspelled names on them, all written in non-parental, elvish handwriting. The moment I knew that Mama and Daddy were out of the house and everyone else was upstairs peeing in the lego box (...yes) or outside building a snow fort, I'd slowly open the basement door, turn on the light, close myself inside so there wouldn't be any cause for suspicion, and walk barefoot down the creaking steps to look upon what would soon be mine.
I wants it! I needs it! Presents! Pushing aside the boys' nerf guns, basketballs, k'nex and cars, I'd go for the gold--a new coat here, the CD I'd asked for months ago, body lotion galore, charms for my hand-me-down antique bracelet. I'd gaze at my goodies in wonder, heart racing if I heard the slightest movement above me, carefully placing the bags back where I found them, taping the wrapped gifts back up completely.
Now I knew. I no longer had to practically pee my pants in the wait until Christmas morning--I could know now, secretly.
Somehow, though, Christmas morning lost its spark after that. Instead of sleeping in my closet by my bedroom door on Christmas Eve just so I could hear the footsteps of the gift-bearers, I slept like a rock in bed until my brothers woke me. Instead of hurrying Daddy to make his coffee and turn the video camera on, I made fun of my brothers for being in such an antsy hurry. Instead of genuine joy upon opening the gifts that were just what I'd asked for, I tried my best to fake surprise. Of course, my parents knew what I'd been doing, and Mama confronted me about it. It hurt her feelings that I would do that--spoil the magic of Christmas morning. Something I see now is that I didn't just ruin it for myself--I robbed my parents of their fun in the whole transaction; I was more focused on the gifts than the sweet fact that they had saved up to be able to make our faces light up.
Why did it have to be so joyless to take things into my own hands?
This is exactly what happens when we stir up love before waiting on God's timing and trusting in His goodness--like Sarai waiting for her promised child, like Rebekah waiting for Jacob's promised blessing, we grow weary in the waiting for love and try to do things our own way. Like Eve in the garden, we feel that God is keeping something good from us--we want to understand, not just to trust the Giver of all good things, and so, listening to our own passions, we start to believe we are not completely free. Our focus is on the one thing we don't yet have instead of the whole garden we've already been given (and in Christ, so much more than that!). We rummage around in the dark for all of the "benefits" of God, but forgetting Him in the process, we lose the joy of a life lived in the light, of fellowship with the Father, of gifts opened at the proper time and not stolen in darkness.
The greatest news is that even though all of us have stirred up and awakened love before it pleased, whether emotionally, physically, or in our minds, our God is both a Redeemer of all that has been lost and the Giver of "love incorruptible" (Eph. 6:24). From the Father, through Christ, by the Spirit, as beloved sons and daughters of the Most High God and as the Bride of Christ, those who have trusted Christ are granted every spiritual blessing, all things that pertain to life and godliness, and all His precious and very great promises--we have redemption through his blood, we live in that reality now, today, as coheirs with Christ--restored, redeemed, reconciled. The best news of all is that we are the Bride of Christ, and we cannot do anything to ruin our inheritance--no amount of rummaging around in the dark can keep us from His unfailing love. The more we know and believe this, the less we will look for life anywhere else. The Father has graciously given us all things.
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God's power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time.
(1 Peter 1:3-5)
The Spirit and the Bride say, “Come.” And let the one who hears say, “Come.” And let the one who is thirsty come; let the one who desires take the water of life without price.
(Revelation 22:17)
2 comments:
Were you the one that peed in the legos?
So wonderful. Thanks for sharing Aly!
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